My anxiety is through the roof. I want to cry, my anxiety is getting worse, and my self medication alcohol makes it way worse. I get anxious if I rip up a piece of paper of a drawing I did but I’m a hoarder and realizing it makes me anxious to throw stuff out. And went out for a smoke and thought of having a drink came by to calm my anxiety I didn’t turned around and went back in only to end up in a group what was extremely stressful because of the people there who are high energy and the group suppose to be on stress and relaxation. I got some types but I wanted to drink talked to the staff afterwards and calmed down just want to relax and my mom is all over me asking me a million stuff have you done this can I scan this in take a photocopy and its like great I don’t need more paper. I trying to get rid of stuff. I am getting so frustrated and annoyed. I don’t know how to cope my obsession to drink or use or anything to feel better is high but I know it will make stuff worse. I have a recovery based meeting tonight so I hope that helps because if not I don’t know what to do I am going crazy.